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expectations

When it looks like you need more… resilience

When it looks like you need more… resilience

As you transform in your business you can experience discomfort and resistance.  In fact, this can occur during any period of change in life events.  At the base of this is stressful and insecure thinking. It can appear in many forms and manifest as:

• Self-doubt • Frustration (with yourself or others) • Anxiety • Physically – in various symptoms • Overwhelm • Uncertainty • Confusion • Stress • Exhaustion

Humans are designed with a self-protection mechanism to keep us safe. This was particularly useful when coming face-to-face with a… Continue reading

Thought Creates the World…

“Thought creates the world and then says I didn’t do it.”

I hadn’t even heard of this quote until 5 months ago but I love it! It is a quote by David Bohm, one of the most influential physicists of the 20th century and a front runner in the field of quantum physics. I realised how true it is when I reflected on my resigning from a post a while back.  I was working my notice and was feeling quite disgruntled as I felt I had moved on in my head and then realised it was down to… Continue reading

Going With the Flow

I am learning to go with the flow! I have a confession to make: I was a real control freak. I say ‘real’ control freak because I didn’t realise I was one. I did things with the best of intentions. I felt that I should be able to make sure everyone was happy and OK.  I had unreal expectations of myself and situations and became frustrated if I couldn’t make things ‘right’. These irrational thoughts and perfectionist expectations led to high stress levels. But now I’m free and am stepping into stillness. So what have I stopped doing and… Continue reading

20 signs you are a good parent…

I have been having a number of conversations recently with groups of people including friends and family about how we all spend time worrying whether we are doing a good enough ‘job’ or not as parents. We do what we think is right at the time and hindsight is a wonderful thing. No matter what we do, our children will always come up against difficulties in their lives and we will have served them well if we equip them to be able to ride the storm as independently as possible within a loving and supportive framework. Hopefully, you will look… Continue reading

Are You a Perfect Mother?

As a mother, do you take time for yourself? Do you spend money on yourself or do you see this as selfish?  I used to. I used to think that my existence once I had a baby was all about my child and I wanted to be a ‘perfect mother’.  I still worked full-time and in fact that made things worse for me because then I felt I had to be ‘Superwoman’.  Needless to say, I couldn’t keep it up and it affected my health.

I began to realise that trying to be a perfect mother is… Continue reading

Are You a Perfectionist?

‘Perfectionism, in psychology, is a personality trait characterised by a person’s striving for flawlessness and setting excessively high performance standards, accompanied by overly critical self-evaluations and concerns regarding others’ evaluations.’

It’s something I know I have. It is a very strong trait in my family. My cousin gave me some wise words years ago. She told me I could run with it and use it being genetic as an excuse and let it take over my life. Or, I could acknowledge it is there and learn to control it.

Perfectionism is a way to control situations, but left unchecked… Continue reading

Expectations Versus Reality

We live in a frantic world; expectations are all around us.

We all have expectations to varying degrees of ourselves and others and there are expectations placed upon us.

We expect others to live by our standards, values and beliefs.

We also have expectations that others will act in a certain way based upon past experiences: let us down, break our trust, leave us.

Our expectations lead us to judge others and feel disappointed if they don’t meet them.

When you become a parent there are expectations you place upon yourself and there are ones placed on us by others.… Continue reading

Have You Ever Said ‘Yes’ When You Meant ‘No’?

“All the mistakes I ever made were when I wanted to say ‘No’ and said ‘Yes’. (Moss Hart)

Often we do this because we want to be liked. However, through doing this we can easily become overcommitted and too busy to enjoy life. Then feel we have let ourselves down and resent the person who asked us.

I have a friend who always used to say, “I’ve done it again.” She is still learning to say ‘No’ but is becoming more aware of this. She would often have ‘No’ in her head but ‘Yes’ would come out of her mouth.… Continue reading

Want more time?

Time is such an enigma. How many times do you say, “I never have enough time” or “I need more hours in a day!” I am guilty of saying these frequently.

Sometimes we need to put in time and commitment in order to achieve and to make something successful. However, we need to ensure some form of balance. The most successful people work hard for long hours but balance it by planning quality time as a break to recharge their batteries and be able to go again.

Plan in quality time with those you love. Look after your health. Plan… Continue reading

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